Friday, June 19, 2009

take time to think!!

well first off let me say iv'e been (m.i.a) yess yess yesss MISSING IN ACTION!! however, im back but whose to say how long for ..but we'll pray i'll get back into the habit..(ha hah ahaha) now where do i start? ...oh yeah i wanted to say whats up with the world and the people in it? why are there so many reality shows? now i understood the flavor flav!! and the newyork..but these shows they putting out now should be all put in a bucket of nothing..maybe thats my opinion but any who..i think its a waist of tapes and time..

Thursday, April 9, 2009


well i know its been a while sweetheart..but it's no excuse!! HOWEVER,
today started off asa a normal day i hopped outta bed turn my alarm clock off...took a look in the mirror said whats now back 2 dressed met my gals and went to the after my 4oclk class is when things started to get complicated! i recieved an text from an ex..i mean end off the alphabet X! we started off hey how you been good onmy end great on his ..he asked about the family.i did the same then he said,....(pause)can I ask you one question? im startled and scared at the same time ..bu ti paly it cool i reply yeah whats up(in my cool voice)he said why didnt you come to see me on my break im thinking uhhh no! but .....i try not to be mean and say the break flew mind you all this was my boyfriend when i was in the 11th grade 06" thats history..what or why do he need to see me?> idk however...i just let it pass a little blast from the past i was dating him on in off for almost 3 years ALMOST!!!!! now i broke te boy heart yes i admitt it but i apologized and mmoved on with my life..i think about him sometimes ...(only because ive endured the karma that came from doing him wrong) i was thinking about my last realationship and how it left me bruised..i loved the crap outta him and i thought it was a mutual feeling i mean dinner and a movie every weekend chuck e cheese to play air hocky..we did it all ..then my dream turned into a nightmare!!!! HE LEFT ME!!!!!:(..YEP JUST LIKE THAT !..i was so hurt i cried cried and cried....that was so hard....when i finally got over him?(now) he want to call text e-mail me and tell me he love and miss me..why didnt he do those things when we were together? idk..all i know is it back to the situation at hand..LOVE-WHAT IS LOVE AND WHY DO IT MAKE YOU FEEL A CERTAIN TYPE OF WAY?
({LOVE)}a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.
a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or like i said i loved him i had a personal attachment to him..but did he have that for is it really true when people say you dont know what you have until it's gone..yea or ne?? well yeah but then again no i never missed dex..11th grade bf..but jay ex bf missed me? i start to wonder do i ever want to love again.......

love....<3 so now i have been single august will make it 1 whole year and i always put on a front like niggs aint shhhh,,(shut your mouth) but in reality i miss loving i mean i miss talking to my boo's on the phone all night and waking up to that text that brightens your whole day..but do i wanna go down the road of pain again.........i dont think nobody want to be lonly but when you been hurt so many times lov turn into phobia's fear of being hurt fear of broken hearts and fear of commitment.....however when it's my time again i will love and love hard,,,but until then i'll just pray for my broken heart to like yesterday i didnt even no your name now today ur always on my mind i never could have predicted i would feel this way you are the beautiful surprise.intxicate everytime i hear your voice you got me on a natural high its almost like i didnt even have no choice you are the beautiful surprise.whatever it is that you came to teach me im am here to learn it cause i belive that we are written in the stars and i dont know wat the future holds but im living in the moment and im thankful for the man that you are. you are everything i asked for in my prayers so i no my angels bought you to my life your energy is healing to my soul you are the beautiful are an inspiration to lfe you are the reason why i smile you are the BEAUTIFUL SURPRISE........

Sunday, February 8, 2009

where have I been?

So its been like ummm FOREVER...sorry I really been BuSy..and what days have been good boring.I suppos...and where can I start to catch up at...oh yeah so wednsday I went to world civ.class and my professor yells pop quiz....I'm so dumbfounded at this point because I actually have no idea of what was going on and the overall problem was that I haven't read the appropriate chapters I think think THINK..nothing come to the noggin...he passes out the test sweat drips from head like the slow evaporation of ice...he looks at me and say are you new to the class I thought for a second say yes the I had another thought to say remembering what my 3rd grade teacher mrs.silver told me go with your first instinct..I decided to say yes with a quiet "yes".. I responded to his question...he takes the test back..saved whew I wipe the sweat off my head..and breath

Sunday, January 25, 2009

my "extra" exciting weekend

Well today is uh sunday and its as if my whole weekend flew by..

I did nothing all weekend except SLEEP!! We'll see what monday bring... :(

Thursday, January 22, 2009

shy but flattered

Okay well today started off BORING.... however that night well the morning..because its now friday was a little all started with a drive to walgreens...everyone knows when your in college and can't sleep bored ..or just have gas to waste...NOT. You joy ride to a 24hr store ..well tonight I settled with wal-greens...close to wal-mart but not quite.....however..I'm creole...but I find myself quite fund of white guys.however this one wasn't on me....while waiting on a friend to finish shopping a girl walks in the store not far behind her. ....yeah her man...and moving on..well she knew what she needed b/c she went picked up some tampons ...and came to the front how do you know she got that welll...because she held them up in the air ...okay while she was in line her boyfriend walked up to me and ask did I work at the hospital miles down...not to mention I had on SCRUBS...!. NO I replied I'm actually a political science we both laughed....she turns around and glances at what do you wanna do with your degree?..I haven't decided yet I exclaimed..oh he then tells me he went to school for real estate and a minor in political were chatting a way...laughing back and fourth..when his woman walks up and say are you ready she looks at me....I do a "Kanye" smile..he looks at her and continue to talk to me by then it got a lil AWKWARD..!!!!..SHE STOOD THERE...looking me up and down...I felt so small ..however she asked ARE YOU READY YET???!!!!..HE SAID YEAH ..he said what school do you go to I told him and we said pur goodbyes.....

That was so crazy not only was he handsome....but he smelt like boom chicka wa yes all I can think of is the tag commercial..TAG...consider yourself warned.......I was tagged...../!!!!!!

So inconclusion I wonder was I wrong for talking to him...or was it beyond my control..idk..conversation was awesome......and if that wasn't his girl I would love to bump into him again......

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

two see or not to see.....

Well where do I start? I'm kinda new at this so bare with me.....and here goes nothing,,.my name is cwills well that's the almost cool "nick name'' I settled with. Today after procrasinating a bit I finally decided to BLOG.!!!! YIPPY FOR ME...YOU'D SAY. However, I spoke with my INSPIRATION(mina lo)..who totally RoCkS @ blogging and told her a life changing event that happened to me today while leavng campus...after a few lol or lmbo... we agreed that this should begin a life with waan hear it here it is.......I found myself standing outside of Bojangles freezing my fannie off ....oh and I was waiting on the cat bus???...yeah I was waiting on the bus 3 min. In the bus comes... while on the bus ..I noticed a man with one thought how weird was this....trying not to stare I turned shyly..whoa he this time he gets up and move adjacent to me........OMG!!! I thought..he's gonna get me to my glancing again to make sure my eyes wasn't playing tricks on me I take a looksie....he don't see me whew I thought...finally I was my time to departure....while walking toward the back exit...I hear pssst , pssst..I turn around to see what the buzz was about I look back and to my discust the "winker" blew a kiss at me Ugh!!!!!!! I thought why oi was so pugnacious...I could have hung him......I pondered all the way to the door things to do....maybe I'll call the police and tell the the route and the bus number give his description (on account how many people in the state have one eye)...explain to them how they have guys assulting females..or call the transit station and let them know what happened.....then I thought to myself where did I go wrong?......I feel like woman or men should be able to enjoy public transportation without being harassed...but idk....
Tell me what you think...?

Am I the crazy one?

Sometimes I wonder..(yelling)..I'm I misunderstood...or am I just a weirdo?....its like okay cool I go to an hbcu....not to mention. its SMALL...however I walk around campus everyday..saying hey or how you doing to every other person I see you know being thr gregarious person that I am and then it hit me.....your weird...why did I come up with that ..uhhh..duh because 2 outta 10 people speak back to sad huh?...yeah think about being me I mean you walk around the same people everyday almost being unnoticed...ALMOST..I SAID..Sometimes I'm not going to lie I try a tad bit to fit in...for ex: going to partay's.or even being with the wrong crowd..

And by wrong crowd I mean WRONG.!!!

Have you ever been witha crowd who just judges everything and everybody?..well I have yeah...its like shut up for crying out loud..and get your own darn life well to sum it up the first week back on campus I had a hideous pimple on my nose yeah either I was guiding santa or I was well when I went to my room....I see my "friends"......ohhhh we missed you and what not....yeah what ever ...I thought yeah of the girls said after we've been together all day you have a bump on your nose ....I started to SCREAM!!! Its as if it wasn't on my damn...nose I mean c'mon now I look in the mirror daily...okay you .got me a lot....however/....UGH...o thought why did she have to tell me as if I didn't know now....on top of that another one of these chicks said OOO.there goes your pretty face ...I was so done..I politly said you know there goes nothing in the words of christina agulara.{I am beautiful } but when the pimple subside I'll be normal and you'd still be an ugly trackstar....

Now was I wrong for that or was their comments a bit ubsurd?